In 1997, Kansas City, cancer sufferer William Bartholme described dying as a lived, experienced, condition, rather than a medical process. It can be said that from the moment we are born, we begin the process of dying. It comes to all of us, yet, as a society, we are chronically unprepared for it. Whether we have been diagnosed with a terminal illness or are supporting a loved one, a hospice book on the dying process might help us get ready for what lies ahead.
Sometimes, families get several months' notice that someone is terminally ill. In other circumstances, there is insufficient time to adjust to the idea. You play the hand you're dealt. In the end, no matter how well prepared you think you are, when the moment arrives, there will still be shock waves. In the meantime, the time interval is an opportunity to sort out the distribution of property, discuss practical matters and sort through the myriad emotions.
Once the shock has worn off that death is on the horizon, families can begin to prepare themselves for the inevitable. Physical changes will take place that will be influenced by the patient's condition. As a caregiver, you will want to know how the person feels about organ donation and whether or not they wish to be resuscitated should the need arise.
Every person is different in how they handle the last few months and weeks of life. Some people are calm and composed while others are terrified. Some people take it as it comes while others want to maintain every last moment of control.
While the person doing the dying will have a lot to think about, so will the other friends and family. Try to steer people toward settling festering disputes and encourage forgiveness all around. This is partly for the peace of mind of the aspiring deceased, but also to ease the grieving process for those left behind.
Whether or not the dying person wants to donate their organs, it is important to have this decision explicitly stated in their records. It is a delicate question and much easier on both the family and the medical team if it is clearly documented. The same goes for emergency treatment in the event of a cardiac arrest or other life-threatening condition. If there is a DNR document (Do Not Resuscitate) in place, it is essential that everyone concerned to be aware of it.
Some people prefer to spend their last days in the comfort of their own homes. Others may require intensive medical care in addition to palliative care. It is useful in both cases to explain the legalities of each situation. In some places, the police are required to attend; this can frighten the relatives if they are not expecting it.
How can you tell when death is imminent. To some extent, this will depend on the nature of the terminal illness. The brain will conserve its last scraps of energy to maintain its own function, so less life-sustaining functions will start to fall by the wayside. They may, for example, lose the use of their legs very close to the end of their life. The moment of death may be preceded by some disturbing moments, such as agonal breathing. It is not always as peaceful and romantic as it is sometimes portrayed. These are just some of the reasons why it is a good idea to find a good reference manual to cover the practical, religious, legal, medical and emotional issues that you are going to face in your role as a psychopomp.
Sometimes, families get several months' notice that someone is terminally ill. In other circumstances, there is insufficient time to adjust to the idea. You play the hand you're dealt. In the end, no matter how well prepared you think you are, when the moment arrives, there will still be shock waves. In the meantime, the time interval is an opportunity to sort out the distribution of property, discuss practical matters and sort through the myriad emotions.
Once the shock has worn off that death is on the horizon, families can begin to prepare themselves for the inevitable. Physical changes will take place that will be influenced by the patient's condition. As a caregiver, you will want to know how the person feels about organ donation and whether or not they wish to be resuscitated should the need arise.
Every person is different in how they handle the last few months and weeks of life. Some people are calm and composed while others are terrified. Some people take it as it comes while others want to maintain every last moment of control.
While the person doing the dying will have a lot to think about, so will the other friends and family. Try to steer people toward settling festering disputes and encourage forgiveness all around. This is partly for the peace of mind of the aspiring deceased, but also to ease the grieving process for those left behind.
Whether or not the dying person wants to donate their organs, it is important to have this decision explicitly stated in their records. It is a delicate question and much easier on both the family and the medical team if it is clearly documented. The same goes for emergency treatment in the event of a cardiac arrest or other life-threatening condition. If there is a DNR document (Do Not Resuscitate) in place, it is essential that everyone concerned to be aware of it.
Some people prefer to spend their last days in the comfort of their own homes. Others may require intensive medical care in addition to palliative care. It is useful in both cases to explain the legalities of each situation. In some places, the police are required to attend; this can frighten the relatives if they are not expecting it.
How can you tell when death is imminent. To some extent, this will depend on the nature of the terminal illness. The brain will conserve its last scraps of energy to maintain its own function, so less life-sustaining functions will start to fall by the wayside. They may, for example, lose the use of their legs very close to the end of their life. The moment of death may be preceded by some disturbing moments, such as agonal breathing. It is not always as peaceful and romantic as it is sometimes portrayed. These are just some of the reasons why it is a good idea to find a good reference manual to cover the practical, religious, legal, medical and emotional issues that you are going to face in your role as a psychopomp.
About the Author:
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